If you’ve been on the Internet at all this week, or even this month, you’ll be aware that Skyrim was released six days ago. And being the fine gaming connoisseurs that we here at Blue Screen of Awesome are, we continue our proud tradition of obsolescence by not talking about it during this time frame. No, Skyrim will have to wait until next week, a time at which everything that can ever be said about it will have circled the Internet a hundred times over; this week, we look at Payday: the Heist.
Payday: the Heist, a cooperative four-player first-person bank-rob-‘em-up, was released on Steam a little under a month ago, but we’ve only just now gotten to actually playing it. Jasper, Jarenth, PlayerIII and a heretofore unnamed mystery fourth player ignored all sense of guidance and direction, jumped into the game immediately, and died a lot. Then, they wrote words about it.
Jasper wants to be an awesome bank robber… but isn’t allowed to be one.
Payday: the Heist is a game that doesn’t know what it wants to be and lies about that to the player. Jarenth explains why this game doesn’t deserve much in the way of praise.
PlayerIII wanted to be a bank robber when he grew up until he played this game. This link will point to his disillusions.
Church was new to the game but not new to the pain. Click here to see what he went through with Scarlett Johansson.
In response to PlayerIII’s review, I would like to point out that the civilians in the second level were like suicidal lemmings.
That’s not to say I didn’t suck, of course, because I did. But scared civilians should not be running right into a goddamn crossfire warzone.